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Solitude and Struggle

From Betty Hollister:
I am not sure why I consistently find my voice to be the dissonant note in this already “minor key fugue.”  It probably all started with the kicking and screaming part.  I found this week’s devotions to be particularly difficult.  I guess they are supposed to be since the theme is “Solitude and Struggle.”  I already talked last week about making peace with solitude and silence and introspection, so I wasn’t too leery when I anticipated this week’s topic. Then wham!  We hear about Antony being “beaten to a pulp” by demons as punishment for being too holy.  The horror of visualizing those physical blows, is somewhat offset by the suggestions of talking back to whatever demons/distractions are placed in our paths today.  Tuesday and Wednesday’s characters are, of course, well known and inspirational stories.  I could find comfort in some of the author’s detail choices, such as Hagar’s name for God or Paul being the recipient of God’s never ending grace in the person of Ananias.  Yet, the overall tone of the text is depressing.  And then, Thursday we see our author’s presentation about the life of St. Francis of Assisi.  St. Francis has always been one of my favorite saints.   Like many I revere him for his love of animals and nature and the environment.  But, the serenity which normally comes to mind with St. Francis is immediately dispelled with focus on his “physically painful life.”  OK, so maybe Pollyanna needs to do a reality check.  Possibly a quote I have used recently by A. W. Tozer needs to color all my thinking about this study.  “It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.”   I will have to include that quote along with several of my other go-to favorites from St. Francis of Assisi in a little more quiet time reflection:

Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.

Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words.

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